Friday, August 29, 2014

the marathon roller coaster

we've been waiting for our agency to receive one piece of paper back from the chinese consulate.

one piece.

then they can ship the 1,000,000,000 pieces of paper (otherwise known as the dossier) to china (this is called DTC: dossier to china), so we can eventually have our log in date (LID) and then our letter of acceptance (LOA) and then our prized travel approval (TA). and then of course, "gotcha day.

until then, honestly, there are days you feel like this:

everything at this point is pretty much out of our control. we're at the mercy of the work ethic, schedule, mood, motivation, official processes of whomever our packet of paper lands on the desk of.

it wears on your heart: the time, the money, the wait, the helplessness of knowing that you would walk on water to cross the ocean to get to them if you could, but you must wait, and this child, this daughter of ours, who has waited 10 years for a family, must continue to wait.

it's a hard wait. a heart wrenching one. if you know someone whom is adopting, and you ask them how the process is going (which is a very common question, and welcome (depending on the mood)), and they reply back they've been waiting "x" number of days for this, and they just want it to be over or to the next step; please, please, please do not respond "it's all in God's perfect timing".

to speak of God's perfect anything would first begin with His perfect will, and His perfect will is NEVER for a child to be orphaned. His perfect will is NEVER for the cultural climate of a country, a race, a people group, a religion to push a mother to abandon her child, abuse her child and them be taken away, etc. His perfect will is NEVER for a woman to be raped and become pregnant from that, or for a child to be born with such special needs the mother knows she can not care for them and thus abandons them or surrenders them to there country/region's child welfare system. all of this is the result of a fallen world where sin and brokenness reign.

His perfect will is for sin of man or scheme of man to be unable to break apart biological families.

we are given biblical mandates to care for the orphan, the oppressed, the widow, the needy, the sick and suffering because we are waiting on Him to restore us to the garden, we are waiting on Him to defeat the enemy once and for all.

the roller coaster of emotions you experience in this process is unmatched: you are always waiting for a exhilarating rush-fall, waiting nervously on the climb, or irritated by the basic chug-along (no one rides roller coaster for those short moments of steady chugging). right now, we are chugging...not even climbing up knowing that exhilarating rush-fall is ahead.

right now i'd settle for a wagon ride down hill. we're coming sweet girl. if i have to walk on water to get to you.

also, we have a new fundraiser page set up; it's humbling to do that. 

i now understand all those mothers who resort to less than desirable profession to provide for their child.  it's so easy to judge them "if they really loved their child(ren), how could they do that?!" "is that the influence they want to be on them?!" "it's their fault they are in that situation, gross."....etc 

trust me, there is no more desperate place that those women are in, who resort to dancing for men to feed their children, out of their love for their child.  (simmer down, i'm not doing that). those women don't want to do that to feed their children, buy them school supplies, pay their bills, etc. and we don't want to have to ask for help to bring our daughter home. but that's where we are at. i love her more than i love my pride. i love her more than any fame and honor in being able to say we did it ourself, because we can't do it ourself. 

i love her more than my fear of rejection, scolding, and helplessness, so i am sharing this here. 
listen to our story presented in this beautiful video, pray with us, pray for us. we have attached incentives/gifts with each donation as well.  

from our humbled hearts, thank you for loving our daughter with us, for the encouragement, for the support, and prayers. 

thank you for helping bring love and freedom to our lucy-girl

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