Wednesday, November 20, 2013

i will fight for you

sweet girl, i will fight for you.
these obstacles only make my love abound for you, and my determination find no limits.

you are not a punishment, (contrary to what i've been told).
i will not sit on a sandy beach, sun shining on me, breeze through my hair, as you wait and wait, wondering when and if somebody will come for you.

money, all that is in this world, belongs to God, and you are more valuable to Him than possessions and wealth of the world, and He will bring us to you, because you are His, and everything is His.

He knows your name, it is written on the palm of His hand.

He will set you in our family, i will tear down walls to bring you home.
my knees grow sore and scarred from time spent praying with fervency for you.

sweet girl, i feel broken, but i am strengthened knowing of His redemptive plan.
He is preparing your home, He is preparing me, your mommy, to continue to fight for you.

all in the world is His, and He will provide and bring us to you.
He knows your name, and will not let you grow lonely, but He will grow us in each other's heart.







psalm 102:

1Hear my prayer, Lord;
let my cry for help come to you.
2Do not hide your face from me
when I am in distress.
Turn your ear to me;
when I call, answer me quickly.
3For my days vanish like smoke;
my bones burn like glowing embers.
4My heart is blighted and withered like grass;
I forget to eat my food.
5In my distress I groan aloud
and am reduced to skin and bones.
6I am like a desert owl,
like an owl among the ruins.
7I lie awake; I have become
like a bird alone on a roof.
8All day long my enemies taunt me;
those who rail against me use my name as a curse.
9For I eat ashes as my food
and mingle my drink with tears
10because of your great wrath,
for you have taken me up and thrown me aside.
11My days are like the evening shadow;
I wither away like grass.
12But you, Lord, sit enthroned forever;
your renown endures through all generations.
13You will arise and have compassion on Zion,
for it is time to show favor to her;
the appointed time has come.
14For her stones are dear to your servants;
her very dust moves them to pity.
15The nations will fear the name of the Lord,
all the kings of the earth will revere your glory.
16For the Lord will rebuild Zion
and appear in his glory.
17He will respond to the prayer of the destitute;
he will not despise their plea.
18Let this be written for a future generation,
that a people not yet created may praise the Lord:
19“The Lord looked down from his sanctuary on high,
from heaven he viewed the earth,
20to hear the groans of the prisoners
and release those condemned to death.”
21So the name of the Lord will be declared in Zion
and his praise in Jerusalem
22when the peoples and the kingdoms
assemble to worship the Lord.
23In the course of my lifeb he broke my strength;
he cut short my days.
24So I said:
“Do not take me away, my God, in the midst of my days;
your years go on through all generations.
25In the beginning you laid the foundations of the earth,
and the heavens are the work of your hands.
26They will perish, but you remain;
they will all wear out like a garment.
Like clothing you will change them
and they will be discarded.
27But you remain the same,
and your years will never end.
28The children of your servants will live in your presence;
their descendants will be established before you.”

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

i weep for you daily

sweet girl.

God is bringing people into our lives already to begin to serve you.  yes, serve you! we were celebrating your friend-cousin's "gotcha day" and i was telling them about you.  your wait, how i longed to bring you home.  how i wanted to move to "---" until i could bring you home, but how we had much to do to prepare your new home.  and a sweet lady there told me she was an OT (we'll be real close to them!), and her husband worked with a charity that remodeled bathrooms for children with special needs.

i laughed as i thought, "God's got this".  i smiled as i thought of how he brought us to you through dreams i've had for the last 2 years.  i question why i deserve to be your mommy, why i deserve to be led to you in dreams, and God's response is that it's not i who deserve it, you deserve the miracles to bring you home.  you deserve His interventions for your life to be redeemed, and promises fulfilled.

i found a lovey for you.  it's a soft teddy bear, and the purchase of it helps other children who lost their mommies and daddies too.

we pray for you everyday.  i cry for you everyday.  in those evenings in my car, alone, driving home, tears stream down my face, and my heart weeps for the pain you've endured, it weeps for you to know we are coming for you, it weeps for you to feel even a fraction of the overwhelming love we have for you.

sweet girl, i hold you in my heart.


Sunday, November 3, 2013

one less, one at a time

your daddy bought a picture for you room, and he's painting it's frame to make it perfectly lovely.
you are in his heart.

today is orphan sunday, and i pray that you won't be alone on this day next year.  i pray you'll be at church with us, a perfect representation of God's love, and His plan for redemption.  i pray that on next year's orphan sunday, you will be one less.  i pray that He has showed us to you in your dreams, and that you know in your heart that we are coming, just as we know in our heart we are coming for you.